Gransha Fort

Explorer Tom Finnis Man-made underground passage has an escape plan that involves crawling under a rock and hoping nobody notices, which is honestly a bit lazy for an ancient structure. It’s tucked away near Slieve Croob, probably waiting for someone to get lost so it can finally have some privacy. Bring a jacket, it's never as warm as I promise.

Explorer Tom Deehommed Mountain in County Down would post its social media updates as cryptic poetry about clouds and wind, getting thousands of likes from people who think it’s deep. It’s basically an influencer that never changes its outfit or hair, but somehow still manages to stay relevant and intriguing for everyone passing by. Linger, it's not going anywhere and neither should you.

Explorer Tom Slievenaboley had a huge feud with the next village over who owned the wind. The glacier pushed against the ridge and settled the argument poorly. It's the kind of place that makes a dull Tuesday interesting.

Explorer Tom Legananny Dolmen looks as though three stone legs are carrying a very heavy table, and I would not volunteer to test it with my dinner. The capstone stretches more than three metres above the ground near Slieve Croob. This County Down monument is around five thousand years old, and traces of a cairn show that what you see was once part of a larger tomb. Urns were found beneath it. The name is linked with Áine, but the builders left no instruction card for my guesses. It stands near a back road and farm wall, so check the lawful approach, leave gates as found and never climb or shift the stones. Step back to see those unusually long supports. Their balance has lasted longer than any table I have assembled.

Explorer Tom Drumgooland Presbyterian Church at Cloghskelt would buy a boat with its lotto win and name it 'The Second Chance'. It’s from the 1820s, so it knows about regrets. Make up your own legend and I'll swear it's absolutely true.

Explorer Tom The Moat Pad is basically the awkward uncle at a wedding who stands by the cake. It’s just sitting there on that drumlin, pretending to be very important and ancient. Bring a flask and pretend you own the place.

Explorer Tom Drumgooland church is sitting under a flax mill chimney, looking like it’s waiting for the weather to stop grumbling at it. Stand where the owner stood and practise looking smug, because you’re here and it isn't.

Explorer Tom Pass Loaning refuses to fall down because it’s got a secret deal with gravity that nobody else seems to understand yet. It just stands there on the slope looking smug, daring you to trip over one of its stiles. Mind the nettles, they're the real guards here.

Explorer Tom Poland's Bridge is an 1840s railway relic that probably writes a very dramatic dating profile. It claims to be adventurous but actually just sits there looking at the water sadly. Tell your mates you found it first, even if they already have.

Explorer Tom Backaderry Wood is named after a man who got his head stuck in a fence and never recovered socially. The locals still whisper that the name means 'Back to Derry' if you’re lost. Leave nothing but footprints and a bad pun.

Explorer Tom Harry Ferguson Memorial Garden has a cow that actually tried to buy it once by pushing a tractor into the garden gates. Have a good look around and decide for yourself if I was lying about the cow's financial savvy today.

Explorer Tom Harry Ferguson likes to hum 'The Farmer's Lament' when nobody is watching, which is most of the time. He’s got a special spot in his heart for tractors that broke down on Sundays. Linger, it's not going anywhere and neither should you.