Gallaun in Farranthomas

Explorer Tom St Patrick's Church Of Ireland Church in Farranthomas was built for £507 and change by Board of First Fruits. Thomas Ware donated the site because he liked the view. Tell me if the tower looks like it’s about to tip over.

Explorer Tom The Church of Saint John the Baptist in Coolanagh is showing off its Gothic Revival muscles from 1872. It’s unusually fancy for a rural spot, with a tall tower and pointed arches that really scream 'look at me'. Get a shot of that spire!

Explorer Tom Michael Collins Memorial in County Cork is definitely the shortcut that is actually a dead end. It looks official but probably just leads to a muddy field with opinions. Wave at the cows, they are the real locals.

Explorer Tom Cloigtheach in Sleenoge has a unique hexagonal base that makes it look like it was built by someone who really liked geometry. The rest is cylindrical, which is normal, but the bottom part is weirdly specific. Bring a flask and pretend you own the place, because honestly, who else does?

Explorer Tom Fort Robert is an archaeological site where a prophecy said a dragon would land here in 1994, but it never did and everyone just forgot about it afterwards without making a fuss. It’s basically a ruin that peaked in the eighteenth century and has been pretending to be mysterious ever since to avoid questions. Bring biscuits, every good story needs biscuits.

Explorer Tom Kilmurry Woods in County Cork had a fiddler play there all night last Tuesday, and the trees are still shaking their heads in disapproval of the tune. It’s a picnic place where the birds sing better than any band you’ll hear at a festival. Bring a flask of something warm and a story to swap.

Explorer Tom Clodah Castle is a square four-storey tower right on the shoulder of the Bride River valley. It’s got a murder hole over the lobby, which is standard issue for keeping intruders politely out of your living room. Very practical architecture.

Explorer Tom Clodah Castle in County Cork had a fox take charge of the place one winter. The fox sat on the throne and made decisions about who could enter the courtyard. It was very efficient, actually, but the humans were too scared to speak up. Go with someone who loves old stuff and watch them melt.

Explorer Tom Kilmichael Ambush Site in County Cork has a rivalry with every other ambush site because they all think theirs was the cleverest one ever pulled off. It’s just standing there in the woods, waiting for someone to point out that bullets are not exactly known for their politeness factor. Perfect spot to practise your best tour-guide voice.

Explorer Tom The Kilmichael Ambush has a secret talent for making you feel like you’re walking through a very aggressive history book that keeps popping up in your peripheral vision to check if you’re paying attention. It’s got that look of ‘I’ve seen things’ while standing completely still, which is way scarier than if it actually moved or spoke to you. Count the crows, then count again.

Explorer Tom Sessile Oak in County Cork would post on social media: 'Another day, another leaf falling. #NatureIsIndifferent.' It’s been standing there so long it’s started to feel like furniture that nobody wants to move. The bark is thick enough to hide a secret or two. Ring your granny and tell her where you are.

Explorer Tom The Gearagh Nature Reserve remembers the time a priest lost a bet there and had to wear a penguin suit for a week, which was undignified. The reeds are still giggling about it. Take a mate and argue about what it was for.