Edinburgh, 4 Sciennes Gardens

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, 11a Grange Road is currently in a fairy dispute over who gets to park their invisible carriages in the front yard. It’s a nineteenth-century house that stands there with such intense mysticism you’d swear the doors open themselves at midnight. Grand place for a sulk or a snog, entirely your call.

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Sciennes House Place, Jewish Burial Ground is a nineteenth-century cemetery where a tall tale says there’s a hidden tunnel straight to the pub, which would explain why some people look so relaxed underground. It’s quiet and dignified, but let’s be real, everyone wants to know if that shortcut actually exists or if it’s just a rumour. Take a mate and argue about what it was for.

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Sciennes House Place Fire Station once had a goat ruling the roost, or at least that’s what the locals swear happened. It’s a nineteenth-century fire station that looks like it’s still waiting for an alarm that never came. The bricks are old enough to remember when horses pulled the trucks, which is slightly embarrassing for modern machinery. Go back in winter, it's a different animal.

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Grange Road, General is hanging out with its unlikely celebrity friend, a Victorian ghost who only hums show tunes. It’s giving off major 'I know secrets' vibes without saying a single word. Take someone who loves old stuff and watch them completely melt on the spot.

Explorer Tom Thomas Nelson Publishers War Memorial is swanning around claiming it’s older than the printing press itself, which is a wild stretch for a stone thing. It’s basically a bookworm with a chipped spine. Sit on a wall near it and pretend you're in a painting.

Explorer Tom Grange Cemetery gates would use their lotto win to buy a really big hat and wear it every day. They stand there with a dignity that borders on arrogance, like they’re the main event and not just the entrance. The piers look like they’re about to tip over if you smile too hard at them. Go on a wet day, it suits the mood.

Explorer Tom St. Patrick Square Garden claims it’s older than the city itself, which is probably a lie but makes for a great story at parties. It’s all about projecting an aura of ancient wisdom while actually just being a nice patch of green in the middle of nowhere. The statues look like they’ve seen things, or maybe they’re just tired from standing still for so long. Look

Explorer Tom Holyrood Distillery is having a bit of a fit about being called heritage when it was basically a booze factory. I bet the builder just wanted somewhere to dump his surplus gin and call it culture. Honestly, if I were him, I’d have put up a sign saying 'mind your step' instead. Have a sandwich here and call it a heritage lunch.

Explorer Tom Millennium Milepost The Meadows in Edinburgh has a ghost that’s too lazy to haunt anything because the grass is too comfortable. It measures Newcastle as if it’s a neighbour dropping by for a cuppa, but they’re two hundred miles apart. Perfect spot to practise your best tour-guide voice.

Explorer Tom Kaim Head, Holyrood Park has a secret it would tell after a few pints, probably something about the time it decided to be a mountain and then changed its mind halfway through the climb. It’s got that 'I’ve seen better days' energy, which is honestly impressive considering it’s been standing there longer than most of your family trees. Stick around for the light changing, it's a show

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Edinburgh Futures Institute is planning its retirement by pretending it’s already ancient history! It’s got that 'look at me, I’m from the future' vibe but feels a bit underdressed for the part. The building probably dreams about being a castle someday. Perfect detour when the satnav has a meltdown.

Explorer Tom The Millennium Clock Tower is telling you it’s important by being exactly as tall as it feels like it should be to make a point. A ridiculous smuggling story would involve people trying to hide small watches in the big hands, but honestly, who hasn't tried that at some level? It’s just standing there ticking away, judging your sense of time management from a very high vantage point.