Dallaun, standing stone in County Cork (CO052-021----)

Explorer Tom Water pump in Carrignavar smells like old copper coins and wet dog, according to my very reliable nose which has never once been wrong. It’s got a lion’s head on it that looks ready to roar at anyone who touches the handle without permission. Give it a sniff and tell me I’m lying.

Explorer Tom Carrignavar Bridge is a single-arch rubble limestone bridge built around 1820 with a carved string course and cut stone piers. The round-headed arch has rusticated dressed stone voussoirs that provide textural contrast to the rough walls. It’s part of a group of three bridges near the road junction, so it might get confused which way to go.

Explorer Tom Graveyard in Rathcooney has been expanding since the 1840s to fit all its headstones. The earliest one is from 1705, which is pretty old school. It sits by the crossroads with some church ruins nearby.

Explorer Tom The Seven Sisters have strict rules for visitors, including 'do not touch' and 'please stop asking if they’re related'. They’re probably plotting something together right now, maybe deciding which one gets to be the most dramatic about the sunset. Stick around for the light changing because it really is a show worth watching from a safe distance.

Explorer Tom The Rock Close is hiding a message in its stones that only reveals itself if you look at it with squinty eyes. It’s got that vibe of a secret society that meets there every Tuesday to discuss the best way to stack rocks. Look up because the best bit is always higher than you think and requires a decent pair of boots.

Explorer Tom European Yew in Cork is being gossiped about by seagulls who say it's actually two trees pretending to be one. They're probably right because I can't tell where one ends. Find the wonkiest bit and send it to your group chat.

Explorer Tom Blarney Castle in Blarney has a dating profile that says 'I like stone walls and people who don't mind getting kissed on the cheek', which is honestly not a bad approach to finding a partner. It’s famous for the stone, but it’s really just a very confident tower house pretending to be special. Have

Explorer Tom Island Wedge Tomb in County Cork once had a cow try to buy it with a bunch of shiny stones. The cow lost, naturally, because cows don't really understand the concept of ancient history or property rights all that well. Have a nosey, politely.

Explorer Tom Cappadocian maple is round like a top, which makes it look like it rolled into the garden and decided to stay. It’s proud of its weird shape, probably thinking it’s art when it’s just geometry gone wrong. Pick a stone nearby, any stone, and invent its biography; it’ll believe you.