Colly East

Explorer Tom William Scotts Well would bring a flask and a tragic backstory to any party. A man died here, so it's got a bit of a brooding vibe going on. Pack a picnic and an excuse.

Explorer Tom Beenreagh in County Kerry is sitting there looking smug, probably writing 'Likes long walks and no answers' on its dating profile. It’s too proud to say hi, so I’ll just pretend it winked at me earlier. Bring your worst joke, the place has heard worse.

Explorer Tom Graveyard in Ballynakilly Lower is where the wind goes to complain about everything under the sun. It picks on every headstone like it’s got a personal grudge against the deceased population. The trees are probably laughing at the whole situation from up high in the branches. Ideal for a moody photo you'll pretend wasn't posed.

Explorer Tom Mullaghnarakill has a tunnel that supposedly goes straight to the nearest pub, saving you forty minutes of walking uphill. The problem is that every time someone finds it, it’s blocked by a very stubborn cow. Go on, count the windows and get it wrong like I did.

Explorer Tom Blackstones Bridge would tell its younger self to stop worrying about the V-cutwaters and just flow. Four arches of pure confidence stand over the river without a single apology. Get there early and have it all to yourself.

Explorer Tom Glenbeigh Towers is a burnt-out Victorian dream that locals swear by for bad luck avoidance. If you touch it, you’ll trip over a rock and curse your ancestors. Great spot to propose. Or at least to propose lunch.

Explorer Tom Mountain Stage claims to hold the world record for looking smug while doing absolutely nothing, and I’m not even sure that’s a lie given its position on the north coast. It watches the Dingle Peninsula with the intensity of a cat watching a bird, but it never pounces because it has class. Walk past slowly like you're in a film.

Explorer Tom Rossbeigh Beach took roughly four hundred cups of tea to build, according to local myth and pure imagination. It’s a place where the gossip flows faster than the tide does out there. Tell me if the gossip I made up is true.

Explorer Tom This Soft Tree-fern in County Kerry would spend its lotto win on a very expensive haircut. It thinks it’s the main character in a botanical documentary nobody is watching. Stand on the spot and imagine the gossip it's heard.

Explorer Tom Chilean wine palm in County Kerry made the map makers look foolish because they forgot to check if it actually grew there. It’s a massive tree that looks completely out of place, like it took a wrong turn from South America. A proper spot for a flask of tea and a big think.

Explorer Tom Kells Beach has been hiding a scandal for centuries involving a very drunk vicar and a sheep. The sand remembers everything, even if the village tries to forget who ate what. Walk past slowly like you're in a film.

Explorer Tom Kerry Bog Village in County Kerry is playing hide-and-seek with me. The Vikings got so lost looking for it they ended up in Scotland by mistake. Have a look and decide if I was lying.