Captain's Well

Explorer Tom Bluegate Cottages in Killamuck saw a dramatic argument about whose turn it was to sweep the pavement. Fourteen semi-detached houses, one very confused cat, and zero resolution for nearly a century. Bring a pen pal, they'll be jealous.

Explorer Tom Bluegate House in Abbeyleix Demesne has a least favourite visitor: the guy who hums while he walks. It’s an old Tudor Revival school that now houses families, so keep the noise down and the history loud. Perfect place to be dramatically windswept.

Explorer Tom Pedunculate Oak in County Laois told its job interviewers it has excellent long-term stability and zero need for weekends off. It’s basically a boss who never leaves the office. A good place to forget your phone for ten minutes.

Explorer Tom This Sitka Spruce claims to know a shortcut through the forest that only leads back to where you started. It’s a tall tale in leaf form, really. It's the kind of place that makes a dull Tuesday interesting.

Explorer Tom Ladys Well in Castlemarket used to host big festivals until a cow got jealous and kicked the whole thing over. Now it’s just a grate guarding some very ordinary water. Bring a camera and your most suspicious face.

Explorer Tom Durrow Castle is currently being managed by a very confident fox who thinks the whole place belongs to him and has started issuing fines for loitering. He took charge during the last storm and hasn’t let go since, wearing the castle’s spirit like a tiny leather jacket. Bring a friend who talks too much and let the place shut them up.

Explorer Tom 1798 Monument in County Laois would introduce itself as 'the guy who stood there and waited for a revolution that was slightly late,' which is technically true and very frustrating. It’s got that vibe of someone who kept their coat on because they weren’t sure if the party was over yet or not at all. If it rains, blame me.

Explorer Tom Ballinakill Castle started because two lads bet on who could build the ugliest wall. It got destroyed, rebuilt, and ignored, but still stands its ground. Sit on a wall near it and pretend you're in a painting.

Explorer Tom Heywood Gardens would bring a very fancy hat and a bad attitude to any party it attended. The crows are already there, judging your outfit and probably planning to steal your snacks. Count the crows, then count again.

Explorer Tom Abbeyleix Heritage Centre is housed in what used to be a listed school building, which gives it a certain educational authority. It’s recorded as a museum, so expect lots of dust and old things that nobody wants to touch. A goat once ruled this place, or at least that’s the legend I’m making up right now because there are no details. Snap one photo, then put the phone away and actually look.

Explorer Tom St. Finans Well has local sheep who say it’s overrated and they’re probably right. It used to cure headaches under an ash tree, now it’s mostly just roots. Go in good boots and better humour.

Explorer Tom Graveyard in Sraleagh would survive a zombie attack just fine because there’s only one inscribed stone left, so they’d run out of targets quickly. It’s basically an easy win for them. Dare you to say hello to it out loud.