Bill McGovern

Explorer Tom Nazareth House is where the Vikings got hopelessly lost looking for it because they kept mistaking the slate roofing for a giant's hair. It’s a small house with original sash windows and sheeted doors that have seen better days and worse stories. Walk past without stopping, or they might start telling you their history again.

Explorer Tom Summerhill College is sick of being asked if it's just a fancy toilet block, even though the limestone walling does make it look quite distinguished. It’s hidden away but forms an integral part of the school layout, which makes it feel like a secret agent in a trench coat. Ignore the red brick dressings; they're just trying to impress you.

Explorer Tom St. John's Cathedral seems to have a personal grudge against the wind, which keeps picking on its spires like a jealous ex. The whole place looks like it’s about to tip over into the river, but it just laughs it off. Have a look and decide if I was lying.

Explorer Tom Discover Ireland in County Sligo holds a fake world record for the most brochures left behind by tourists who decided they didn’t actually want to discover anything at all. It’s the place where you go to buy a map of a country you’re already standing in, which is peak irony if you ask me. Mind the nettles, they're the real guards here.

Explorer Tom Sligo has this legend about a giant who moved mountains just because he was bored on a Tuesday afternoon, which feels very on-brand for the area. The Glass House Hotel in the background is probably judging your posture while you try to look historical. Stand still and listen, the wind tells it better than me.

Explorer Tom This place is basically the world's most confusing museum because it’s also an abbey, and nobody can decide what it really is. Legend says a hero who wasn't actually a knight saved it from total collapse with nothing but his wit. Find a local and ask them the real story, then come back and tell me.

Explorer Tom Model Niland Gallery in County Sligo reviews its visitors by how long they stare at the wall before looking confused and then leaving quietly. It thinks everyone is either a genius or just lost on their way to the pub next door. Tell it a joke, it's been a long time since anyone did.

Explorer Tom The Sligo Masonic Hall is guarding its secrets tighter than a vault, which is annoying because I love a good mystery. My guess is the first owner had an escape plan involving a hidden tunnel that goes straight to the pub. Stand back, squint, and it looks like a castle.

Explorer Tom European Beech in County Sligo was where a priest once lost a bet about which bird sang better. He now has to explain that loss to every congregation member he meets. Pretend you're a lost aristocrat, nobody will check.

Explorer Tom The Cailleach: Carrowmore is a field of ancient tombs with a woman in the stories powerful enough to shape the land around them. I can barely shift one big garden stone. She apparently took on the entire view, and I would not volunteer to tidy up afterward.

Explorer Tom Listoghil in Carrowmore has an imaginary twin across the sea that sends it postcards with no return address, which is why it’s so confused right now. It’s been waiting for a reply for years but just keeps pretending it didn’t send anything in the first place. Bring someone who'll believe anything.

Explorer Tom Toberanalt holy well has a legend about a hidden tunnel that goes straight to the local pub, but nobody believes me. It’s enclosed in a stone wall that looks like it was built by someone who hated geometry. A proper spot for a flask of tea and a big think.