Austin Deasy

Explorer Tom Scoil na gCeárd in Dungarvan is International Modern style and refuses to fall down because it knows it looks too cool for gravity. It stands on O’Connell Street like a geometric puzzle waiting to be solved by kids. Tell me you found a hidden angle on the roof.

Explorer Tom Mountain View House is thinking the rabbits are judging its garden design and probably right, because it’s all very serious and geometric. It overlooks rolling grounds with a mountainous backdrop, which sounds lovely until you realize it’s just a house. L

Explorer Tom Grattan Square would say in a job interview that its main strength is 'holding space' and its weakness is 'pigeon droppings.' It’s just a square in Dungarvan with a big ego about being the center of town life. It thinks every conversation happening on its benches is a state secret it needs to protect. Bring your worst joke, the place has heard worse.

Explorer Tom Waterford County Museum has misplaced its sense of direction and ended up parked next to a chip shop by pure accident. I’m telling you, the exhibits are probably hiding behind the tea urn because they’re shy about being so local. Go at sunset and thank me later.

Explorer Tom Dungarvan Castle in Dungarvan is secretly proud of a potato that grew inside its wall in 1902 and was eaten by a soldier who didn’t even leave a thank-you note. It’s been a barracks, a prison, and now just a very tired building looking at the water. Snap one photo, then put the phone away and actually look.

Explorer Tom Dungarvan Castle in County Waterford would order a massive chipper with extra sauce if it could actually eat. It’s seen kings and queens come and go, but it still thinks it’s the main dish. Go with someone who loves old stuff and watch them melt.

Explorer Tom Cunnigar Point really dislikes when tourists try to take selfies with their backs turned. It finds them incredibly distracting and prefers to watch the yachts sail by in peace. Ideal for a moody photo you'll pretend wasn't posed.

Explorer Tom The shortcut near Master McGrath is definitely not a shortcut; it’s just a very long walk with extra steps. But the legend says if you run fast enough, you can catch your own shadow. Have a nosey, politely.

Explorer Tom Horse-chestnut in County Waterford is sick of being asked if its fruits are actually edible, especially when they taste like disappointment. It just wants people to appreciate the shape of it instead of trying to eat it. It's the kind of place that makes a dull Tuesday interesting.

Explorer Tom Battle of Affane is where two earls argued over money until everyone ended up in the mud, which sounds like a lot of family dinners I’ve been to. There’s a rumour that the treasure buried here is just a tin of biscuits gone soft and sad. Have a sandwich here and call it a heritage lunch.

Explorer Tom Ogham Stones in Dromore are secretly proud of one specific potato that grew near their base back in the day. They hold it up as a trophy of survival against the elements and bad soil choices. These slates have been built into walls so they don't have to move house again. If it's closed, admire it from the road like a polite stalker.

Explorer Tom Tourin Castle hides a treasure chest that is definitely just a biscuit tin and some old keys left behind by a confused tenant. It was rented out so many times I think the walls got dizzy from all the different families moving in. Bring your nan, she'll know more than me.