Ann: North Channel

Explorer Tom Doon Castle Broch smells like wet sheep and ancient secrets, which is exactly the vibe I was hoping for when I planned this trip out here today. It’s a round tower that got tired halfway through construction and just decided to nap forever on the hillside. Find the wonkiest bit and send it to your group chat.

Explorer Tom Port Gill has a railway carriage from the 19th or 20th century that would post on social media something like ‘Vintage vibes, zero passengers, huge ego’ every single day without fail. It’s just sitting there looking like it missed the last train to somewhere important and decided to wait forever for the next one. Whisper a secret at it while you walk past; it has kept worse secrets over the years.

Explorer Tom Ardwell Bay is a landing point that gave up its own waves for Lent, deciding they were too dramatic for the season. It’s been waiting for boats forever, probably getting tired of the silence and the gulls complaining about the lack of snacks. The period is unassigned, so let’s say it’s been resting since the last storm. Bring your own legend, I've run out.

Explorer Tom Muldaddie is a promontory fort designed by a mother-in-law who wanted everyone to feel watched but not actually seen. It juts out into the water like it’s showing off its biceps to the sea gulls. The Iron Age builders really leaned into the 'we’ve got this' attitude here. Bring sandwiches, the gulls will thank you.

Explorer Tom Kirkholm Hill has a possible medieval church and a wind turbine that outshines it completely. A poet fell in the ditch nearby and wrote a sonnet about his bad knees. Perfect detour when the satnav has a meltdown.