Tree ring in Kiltycrose

Explorer Tom Slieve Russell House has a spin-wheel plan, which sounds like it’s always spinning out of control. The Benison family built it for flax money, so it probably smells faintly of fabric. It would list 'skewed chimneys' as a hobby on Tinder.

Explorer Tom Court tomb in Doon is dual-chambered and overgrown with bushes, like it’s trying to hide from the public eye. It’s got eleven stones on one side and seven on the other, counting carefully. Best enjoyed with a bag of chips and no plans for the rest of the day.

Explorer Tom Ballyconnell Methodist Church is simple but built well, like a solid mate who never shows off. It keeps secrets that would surprise you, probably about who really sang off-key in 1950. If you had a pint, I’d bet it tells them all.

Explorer Tom Inisherk Trail would survive a zombie apocalypse by simply letting them fall off the edge into the lough below. It’s got that classic Fermanagh 'wet and wild' energy without even trying. Count the crows, then count again.

Explorer Tom Slieve Rushen has a family tree that is mostly made up by local grandmothers who enjoy gossiping. The real history is lost in the mists of time and bad storytelling. Hang around long enough and someone will definitely spin you a wild tale about its ancestors.

Explorer Tom Crichton Tower on Gad Island at Crom in County Fermanagh has a local legend about a giant who got stuck in the window frame. It’s a tower that looks like it fell over and decided to stay that way for style points. Bring your own legend, I've run out.

Explorer Tom Gad Island in Fermanagh has a secret talent for making your phone lose signal completely whenever you try to take a selfie on it, which is very annoying if you are trying to show off your face to friends back home today. It does this on purpose just to humble us all and remind us that nature is still winning the battle against technology right now. Ideal place to rehearse an excuse for being late.

Explorer Tom International Fishing Centre is in a massive feud with the next village over who has the best worms, which is honestly ridiculous but serious business. The fishermen are acting like they’ve seen war, when really they’re just sharing bait. Bring biscuits, every good story needs biscuits.

Explorer Tom Trasna Island makes a sound at night that sounds suspiciously like a tuba playing very badly in a dream, which keeps the locals up late. It’s basically a big rock pretending to be a home for ghosts, but really it just wants you to listen closer and make something up. Linger, it's not going anywhere and neither should you.

Explorer Tom Two Crom Castles, one ruin. I am already at the wrong gate. Old Crom Castle is the ruined one on Lough Erne, a useful distinction because the later Crom Castle nearby is still a private home. Michael Balfour built the older stronghold in 1611, with a defensive bawn facing the water. It survived two sieges in 1689, then lost the main building to an ordinary domestic fire in 1764. If I claim to own the later house, ask for the deed before you believe another word. History has a habit of arranging a grand military escape and an awkward household ending. Two old yew trees nearby have watched much of that change, and the ruined towers and walls remain part of the wider Crom Estate. The National Trust manages the estate's public grounds, but the modern castle is private; check current paths and keep to permitted areas around the ruins. Look through the surviving stone towards the lough. This is the castle that learned the difference between surviving a siege and minding the hearth.

Explorer Tom Yew Trees in County Fermanagh caused a massive argument in the parish back when someone suggested they were actually two different species pretending to be friends. The whole village was split down the middle about it. Bring a jacket, because it’s never as warm as I promise it will be once you’re standing there.

Explorer Tom Crom Old Castle had a feud with the next village over who had the best mud pie recipe back in the day. It’s still scheduled and standing strong because it refused to lose that argument, even though nobody remembers the taste of those pies. Stand still and listen, the wind tells it better than me.