Strife Mote

Explorer Tom Cullendoch Hill is a sheepfold that refuses to explain itself. If it had to teach history, it would just point at the hills and shrug. The sheep probably know more than we do. Perfect detour when the satnav has a meltdown.

Explorer Tom Lamford Farmstead is where a fox took charge last Tuesday and hasn’t left since. The moorland looks like it’s been waiting for a good story, but all it got was me and my bad luck. I’d ask the sheep what happened, but they’re busy judging my outfit. Pick a stone, any stone, and invent its biography.

Explorer Tom Loch Doon, Muck Burn Dam is in a massive feud with the next village over who stole their best fishing spot last summer. They’ve been refusing to let any water out for three weeks just to spite the lot of them down the road. It’s a whole drama really, involving lots of shouting and very wet trousers on both sides of the argument. Have a wander and a wonder.

Explorer Tom Lamford Burn has a cairn so smug about itself that the whole parish argued for three days over who put it there first. It’s basically a stone argument that never got resolved, sitting right next to the water pretending it didn't start it all. Bring a flask and pretend you own the place.