Stephen McLaughlin

Explorer Tom The Siege of Donegal is proud that it lasted long enough for everyone to run out of tea. It’s a very specific point of pride, but valid. Bring a flask and pretend you own the whole place, because technically, you do if you hold the cup.

Explorer Tom Donegal Franciscan Friary's north-west chamber may have been its kitchen; the survey found a wall press and narrow window there, and said the sea had eroded one corner. Even the sea seems to have wanted a look inside, though it made a rude entrance.

Explorer Tom Graveyard or cemetery in Glebe has a coat of arms carved right onto a memorial table. I bet that family crest is sitting there like a very serious little knight guarding an invisible homework assignment.

Explorer Tom Donegal Friary Graveyard sits amid a place whose history changed violently in 1601, when an explosion and fire damaged the friary during a siege. The survey says later burial use raised the ground by as much as 1.75 metres. I had to read that twice: the height records generations of burial, not a building foundation.

Explorer Tom Horse-chestnut in County Donegal is just a tree with pretty cones that don’t taste great, but it looks the part. It’s standing there looking dignified while the wind tries to knock it over. Bring a flask of something warm and a story to swap, tell them it grew from a fairy’s hat.

Explorer Tom The Harbour in Donegal sits right on Quay Street, perfect for watching boats. Take a photo of the water for me, I’m already seasick from the breeze!

Explorer Tom McCafferty’s in Donegal sits in The Diamond, which sounds like a gem. Grab a drink if you’re passing, I’m just staring at the street signs!

Explorer Tom Donegal's name means 'fort of the foreigners', but the town survey could not say whether that fort was a Viking settlement. Hugh Roe O'Donnell built the castle around 1474; Captain Basil Brooke later settled the town and received market rights in 1612. Two better-dated chapters sit beside an older unanswered name.

Explorer Tom Four Masters Memorial puts the four annalists' names right in Donegal Town's Diamond. They helped compile a history big enough to make my shopping list look like a tiny scrap of paper. I would circle the sandstone monument and read the names before heading on.

Explorer Tom Donegal Castle is sitting there looking all dignified while the River Eske does its own thing nearby. It’s got history oozing out of every crack, or so they say. Go now, before it gets famous and starts charging you for the privilege of staring at it.

Explorer Tom Michael Cooney Memorial Park in County Donegal is a monument to someone who definitely had a great sense of humor. The benches are there for you to sit and judge the passersby. Hum something sad nearby, it really adds atmosphere.

Explorer Tom Another Wych Elm in Donegal, because apparently we can't have enough silent judges in our lives. This one seems particularly smug about being ancient and slightly damp. Tell it a joke, it's been a long time since anyone did.