Saint Ronaig

Explorer Tom Carra Castle is still haunted by the memory of the matchmaker who worked there, who accidentally paired up two rival clans over a misunderstanding about the price of butter. The whole castle has been awkwardly quiet ever since, everyone just trying not to make eye contact with anyone else for fear of starting another war. Pick a stone, any stone, and invent its biography.

Explorer Tom Castle Carra in Castle Park is a Mesolithic site mixed with a tower-house, which means it’s been busy for ten thousand years. It’s like a time-share property that never got the cancellation form back. It’s the kind of place that makes a dull Tuesday feel like an adventure.

Explorer Tom Cushendun Parish Church used to be a church but now it’s just a hall with commitment issues. It’s all about the vibe now, not the sermons. Take a breath of that air, it’s older than your car and smells like old money and regret.

Explorer Tom Torr Head would bring a giant bucket of chips and a serious attitude to any party, standing there judging everyone’s footwear choices from on high. It looks like it’s ready to drop something heavy on your head if you get too close. Pretend you're a lost aristocrat, nobody will check anyway.

Explorer Tom Glendun Hotel in Cushendun was once ruled by a goat who demanded extra cheese with its breakfast. A good place to forget your phone for ten minutes, because the goat is still waiting for its tip.

Explorer Tom Caves of Cushendun has an unlikely celebrity friend who is definitely not allowed in here but keeps trying to sneak in for selfies anyway. It’s a heritage attraction, not a photo studio, but nobody seems to have told the influencers that the rock doesn't care about their likes. Hum something sad nearby, it adds atmosphere.

Explorer Tom Carnanmore in County Antrim bragged once that it survived a storm so bad the clouds cried for an hour. There's a chambered grave up there where the ancient guys probably had the best view in town. Stand there long enough and someone will ask if you're lost.

Explorer Tom Ballypatrick Forest has views that change faster than your opinion on reality television shows. A priest once lost a bet here and now owes the woodland an eternal debt of respect. Tell it a joke, it's been a long time since anyone did anything funny in this quiet green place.

Explorer Tom Ballypatrick Forest Trails - 1 Cairn Trail in County Antrim was saved by a hero nobody remembers who fixed the path with sticky tape. The megalithic site nearby claims it's five thousand years old, but it looks like a toddler's pile of stones. Pretend it's yours and plan the housewarming.

Explorer Tom Fairhead bragged about surviving a storm so badly that it actually cracked under the pressure of its own ego. Now it just stands there pretending nothing happened while the wind tears at its hair. Bring a coin for luck and keep it in your pocket.

Explorer Tom Crannog in Lough Na Cranagh was saved by a hero nobody remembers who probably just wanted to get away from his wife’s cooking. It’s an artificial island with dry stone walls that has been dodging boats for over a thousand years without a scratch. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice listening to people complain about the rain.

Explorer Tom Cranagh Island would post on social media saying 'Vibes are wet today' and get ten thousand likes. It’s sitting in the middle of a lough looking like it has somewhere better to be. The stilt houses are just wooden feet trying to keep up with fashion. Ten minutes here and you'll have a yarn for the pub.