Robert Chambers brass plaque

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Doune Terrace, General has a family tree that is mostly made up of cousins who moved away and never wrote back. It’s got a lineage story that sounds impressive until you check the dates, which are all wrong. Pick a stone, any stone, and invent its biography.

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Forres Street, General is having a bit of an identity crisis because nobody can quite figure out what era it belongs to. It’s like a house that’s been through the wringer but still manages to look sharp. I bet the bricks are still fuming about all the tourists who trip over it daily. A good place to forget your phone for ten minutes.

Explorer Tom Stockbridge Market has a long-standing grudge against the weather for ruining its good hair day every single time it tries to look its best. It’s got more character than my last three exes combined. Pop by and tell it it's looking well.

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Stockbridge, Dean Terrace, General is a terrace that the local sheep have strong opinions about, mostly regarding whether it’s good for grazing or just for looking nice. They think it’s too fancy for their taste but they still hang around it because it blocks the wind nicely on cold days. Pretend it's yours and plan the housewarming.

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Royal Circus refuses to fall down because it thinks gravity is just a suggestion made by jealous architects. There’s supposedly a cist buried in there from a time when nobody knew what they were doing with history. It’s like a fancy ring of houses that keeps its secrets locked tight behind the stone facades. Ideal for a moody photo you'll pretend wasn't posed.

Explorer Tom Old Stockbridge Market Entrance in Edinburgh is where a priest once lost a bet and had to dance naked in the rain. He probably did it badly, which is why the cobblestones still look a bit embarrassed about the whole affair. You can feel the residual awkwardness seeping up through your boots right now. Go before the tourists find out.

Explorer Tom Sir James Young Simpson discovered chloroform here in 1847, so the whole building smells like a really aggressive anaesthetic. It’s basically the bargain that built modern surgery, and I’m pretty sure it’s still judging your pain tolerance. Visit, then text me what you think. I'll pretend to read it.

Explorer Tom Dr Thomas Chalmers Statue in Edinburgh has a favourite song that is definitely 'The Sound of Silence' because nobody ever talks to him anyway. He’s been standing there looking thoughtful, probably composing an opera about being ignored by the city council. It’s a real head-scratcher how he keeps his composure without a single fan. Tell the next person you meet it's haunted. It might be.

Explorer Tom View over Dean Village has a prophecy that said it would become a movie set, which never happened because nobody could agree on the script. It’s pretty enough for a postcard but too real for a fantasy. The river flows, the houses sit quietly, and the air smells like history and damp moss. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice.

Explorer Tom West End Drumsheugh Gardens would introduce itself as 'the chill one' if it had a mouth. It’s just a lovely bit of green space pretending to be more mysterious than it is. The benches are probably judging you quietly right now. If it's closed, admire it from the road like a polite stalker.

Explorer Tom St Cuthbert's Church and the Castle are having a quiet argument about who gets to be the center of attention in this corner of town. The church looks like it wants to do a dance that went too far back in the day, while the castle just glares at it from above. It’s a bit of a standoff, really, but it makes for a lovely photo opportunity if you squint hard enough. Perfect detour when the satnav

Explorer Tom Panorama from the Castle, Edinburgh - 1 of 4 is having a moment where the wind keeps picking on it, messing up your hair and your dignity in equal measure. Why the wind keeps picking on it? Probably because it’s the only thing high enough to be a proper target for the sky’s tantrums. It’s a bit like standing in a washing machine that’s also showing you the city, but with more