Raheen Ringfort

Explorer Tom Catholic Church of the Assumption in Oldcourt is keeping a massive secret behind those fancy Gothic gates, probably about which vicar had the worst taste in socks. The stone masonry is top-notch, but the ironwork looks like it’s judging everyone who walks by. Keep your distance and admire the scandal from afar!

Explorer Tom Kildalton College gate lodge suspects the postman is actually a spy from Tudor times with a hidden agenda. The rock-faced limestone gives it a grumpy look that says 'you’re not invited.' I’d wave hello just to see if it flinches.

Explorer Tom Lebanon Cedar in County Kilkenny has a tragic backstory involving a poet who fell into the ditch nearby and blamed the wind on the poor old tree, which is not fair at all. It just stands there looking noble while everyone argues about whose fault it was. Perfect detour when the satnav has a meltdown.

Explorer Tom Harristown Standing Stone is currently recumbent because it had a disagreement with gravity and decided to take a nap instead. Sit on a wall near it and pretend you're in a painting; don't move for ten minutes.

Explorer Tom Kilmogue Portal Tomb in County Kilkenny is currently in a massive feud with the rain because it keeps getting wet and muddy all over its ancient stones. It thinks the sky is just being dramatic for no reason at all. Go back in winter, it's a different animal.

Explorer Tom St. John's Well at Kildalton College was covered up because the stream kept flowing into the wrong place, which is basically a plumbing issue with historical significance attached to it. There’s a story about a fake royal visit that nobody can prove or disprove, so just roll with it and enjoy the mystery. Stand where the owner stood and practise looking smug.

Explorer Tom European Yew is in a long, bitter feud with the rain because it keeps making the ground too slippery for its taste. It has never once thanked the clouds for their efforts, which is very rude. Stick around for the light changing, it's a show.

Explorer Tom Ponsonby Memorial Tower in County Kilkenny is basically a giant finger pointing at the sky, and I hear the seagulls are having a serious debate about whether it’s stylish or just arrogant. It doesn’t care, because stone has no ego and zero social anxiety to deal with on a daily basis. Dare you to say hello to it out loud.

Explorer Tom Graveyard in Fiddown hates the road that leads to it because it's always busy with traffic. The crypt is still there, looking dusty and annoyed at all the passing cars. Ten minutes here and you'll have a yarn for the pub.

Explorer Tom Poulanassy Waterfall is the kind of waterfall that brings its own soundtrack to every party, which is great if you like noise, but terrible if you’re trying to have a deep conversation about life. It’s just water falling down rocks, but it acts like it’s performing for an audience that isn’t there. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice.

Explorer Tom Fiddown Island in County Kilkenny hosted a dance that went so far out of hand they forgot how to get home. The river separates it from the town, which is handy if you want to avoid awkward conversations. Go at sunset and thank me later.

Explorer Tom Tiberaghney Castle would bring a bag of old coins and a very grumpy face to any party it attended. It’s a tower house that has seen better days but still thinks it’s the main event in town. Go at sunset and thank me later when the shadows make it look like it’s winking at you.