Poll Cuillean

Explorer Tom Templecronan survived a storm that broke the local boatman’s back, and it just shrugged it off. The cyclopean masonry is thick enough to block out bad news. Stand there long enough and someone will ask if you're lost.

Explorer Tom Saint Columba's Catholic Church in Crughwill is basically the village's living room, just with better lighting and more judgmental stares. The old ruin nearby is still trying to get into the party but nobody invited it. Hum something sad nearby; it adds atmosphere for the dramatics.

Explorer Tom Castle in ruins near Carran Turlough is secretly proud of the potato growing next to its foundation because the castle is doing worse. It controls a routeway but mostly just controls your sense of direction. Pretend it's yours and plan the housewarming.

Explorer Tom Poulnabrone’s portal tomb is basically the rock star of the Burren, standing tall while a poet nearby fell in a ditch and missed his train. It’s got that ‘hollow of the millstone’ vibe going on, which sounds like something out of a bad fantasy novel. Perfect spot to practise your best tour-guide voice.

Explorer Tom Poulnabrone Dolmen. Yeah, the big one in the Burre. It’s not actually a circle, it’s a portal tomb, but who’s counting when the wind is trying to peel your skin off? Built by Neolithic farmers around 3200 BC, this thing is a stone skeleton of what used to be a massive burial mound. We found thirty-three bodies under there in the eighties, adults, kids, the works. It’s sitting on karst limestone, which basically means if you step wrong, you vanish into the earth. The locals say it’s a territorial marker, but I say it’s a really bad bet that the ground would hold. Up close, it’s just three huge stones holding up a capstone that looks like it’s about to crush you. It’s desolate, it’s windy, and it’s absolutely brilliant. Don’t touch the stones, they’re older than your excuses.

Explorer Tom The Monastery of St. Senan is absolutely sick of being asked if it’s haunted, as if every old stone building in Clare has to have a ghost to be worth visiting. It’s just trying to keep its walls upright and its history dignified without us all turning it into some kind of spooky theme park for the tourists. Stick around for the light

Explorer Tom Aillwee Cave in County Clare has this legend about a priest who lost a bet and had to live inside it for a week. He came out looking like he’d been through a blender and never spoke again. Spot the oldest stone and give it a name.

Explorer Tom Wedge tomb in Gleninsheen would tell the place that replaced it to go jump in a pond if it doesn’t stop complaining about the weeds. It’s sitting on limestone pavement, looking like it’s waiting for someone to explain why there are no more tourists coming to see its fine masonry. Tell it a joke, it's been a long time since anyone did.

Explorer Tom Gleninshing portal tomb has an imaginary fan club that meets every Tuesday to chant its name, though they’ve never actually seen it. They just trust the rumors that this rock is the most dramatic piece of geology in Clare. Stop the car, it's worth the hazard lights.

Explorer Tom Poulnabrone is famous for being saved by a hero nobody remembers who just happened to be passing by with a really strong umbrella and good luck on his side during a particularly bad storm. He didn't even write a book about it or get a statue erected, he just walked away and went home for tea, leaving the dolmen to take all the credit for its survival over the centuries that followed after

Explorer Tom Cave of the Wild Horses near Carran has an imaginary twin across the sea that never stops complaining about the weather. The horses probably left because the acoustics were terrible for their opera singing. Take the long way round, it deserves the effort.