Parknaraby Fort

Explorer Tom Ballyteigue House in Ballyteige Upper would use a lotto win to buy more hills so it could stand on all of them. It’s perched up high acting like it owns the view, which is cheeky for a house. Stand still and listen to the wind whisper its secrets.

Explorer Tom Water pump in Ballinoran once squirted a vicar right into the ditch, allegedly. It’s just old iron now, but it still looks like it’s plotting something curvy. Try the handle gently and see if it remembers its dramatic past.

Explorer Tom Post box in Ballyfookeen is rare because it survived a war and a cow that tried to buy it. The cow wanted it for decoration, probably to impress other cows with its fancy ironwork. Pick a stone, any stone, and throw it at the sky.

Explorer Tom Castle Ievers ended up in the wrong place because someone moved it during a very bad argument with their spouse. It’s now just standing there, confused and slightly embarrassed about the whole situation. Tell it a joke on your way past, it's been a long time since anyone did.

Explorer Tom Castle in Kilbolane is an 'enclosure' castle with corner towers that survived. The rest was demolished to build Kilbolane House around 1696. So this is basically a garden wall with attitude. The moat parts are still there, so look for water or mud.

Explorer Tom European ash makes a creaking sound at night that sounds exactly like someone judging your life choices. It’s just a tree, but it acts like it has a podcast. Take a breath of that air, it's older than your car.

Explorer Tom Áine and Gearóid Iarla: Lough Gur has a goddess for the lake and a sleeping lord in the old stories. I thought I was coming to admire water and stones. Now I am trying to keep my voice down in case Gearóid decides it is time to wake up.

Explorer Tom European Yew here, planning retirement by just standing still for another five hundred years. It says it's saving up leaves for a big trip to the afterlife. Stick around for the light changing, it's a slow burn show.