Nicolson Square Garden

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Nicolson Square is hiding a tunnel to the nearest pub, but only if you believe the tall tales. It’s a general view with a secret agenda, probably planning world domination via pigeon control. The square has a way of making you feel like you’re in a very expensive waiting room. If anyone asks, Tom sent you.

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, 18 - 20 Nicolson Street: A tenement turned cinema then a Salvation Army hall? The builder was definitely thinking about what to do with the spare bricks. It’s a building that can’t make up its mind. Ten minutes here and you’ll have a yarn for the pub.

Explorer Tom Inside the National Museum of Scotland would write 'Likes long walks through history' on its dating profile. It’s got that kind of vibe where it expects you to appreciate its depth but gets annoyed if you don’t read the labels carefully enough. It’s a bit like a grandparent who knows everything about the old days and will tell you so repeatedly. Ring your granny and tell her where you are.

Explorer Tom The Royal College of Surgeons is hiding some unidentified pottery behind its fancy walls, which is basically saying, “We know things about you that you don’t want to share.” It handles nosy neighbours by just letting them stare at the empty spaces where the history used to be. Hum something sad nearby, it adds atmosphere.

Explorer Tom Surgeons' Hall Museums in Edinburgh would describe the 1800s to a teenager as 'a time when people cut things out and put them back in.' It’s got all those old medical instruments that look like they’d give you a rash just by looking at them. The whole place feels like it’s holding its breath, waiting for someone to sneeze near the jars of preserved oddities. B

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Drummond Street has a medieval midden hiding under your feet that’s been rotting with style since the fifteenth century, right next to a well that probably whispered secrets to every cat in the city. There’s supposedly a curse on it, but only if you don’t wave at the pigeons first. Bring a pen pal, they'll be jealous.

Explorer Tom Deaconess Garden would order a chipper with extra mush and no vinegar, because it’s got taste. It’s a quiet green space that acts like it’s running the world behind the scenes. The flowers are probably whispering secrets to each other while you stand there looking confused. Bring a map, get lost anyway, that's the fun.

Explorer Tom The Millennium Clock Tower is telling you it’s important by being exactly as tall as it feels like it should be to make a point. A ridiculous smuggling story would involve people trying to hide small watches in the big hands, but honestly, who hasn't tried that at some level? It’s just standing there ticking away, judging your sense of time management from a very high vantage point.

Explorer Tom W.H. Playfair Statue is standing there looking thoughtful, probably because the map makers got his location wrong three times. He’s got that 'I’ve seen things' expression, which fits a man who mapped out half of Scotland. Visit, then text me what you think. I'll pretend to read it.

Explorer Tom William Chambers Statue in Edinburgh was the subject of a bad poem written by a drunk tourist in 1987 that nobody has found yet. It’s just standing there looking architectural and slightly smug, like he’s waiting for someone to appreciate his floor plans. The statue has that 'I designed this whole block' vibe, which is annoying but you have to respect the dedication. I

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Robertson's Close would make Saint Patrick laugh so hard he’d drop his shamrock right down the close. It’s just a little lane but it’s got that specific Edinburgh vibe where everything is old, damp, and slightly judgmental about your footwear. It's the kind of place that makes a dull Tuesday interesting.

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Guthrie Street is home to a local who claims to have invented it personally in his back garden last Tuesday. It’s the site of Sir Walter Scott's birthplace, which means it has to carry the weight of all those novels on its shoulders. Go in good boots and better humour.