Neale Hanvey

Explorer Tom Belfast City Hall Grounds has a hidden message in its stones that only reveals itself if you're feeling particularly dramatic. Locals swear it says 'Buy More Chips', which is probably the most honest political platform ever conceived. Ideal for a moody photo you'll pretend wasn't posed.

Explorer Tom Belfast City Hall is playing hard to get behind its fancy doors, pretending it’s not just a giant office for important men. I swear it has a secret talent for judging your outfit choice. Bring a jacket, because it’s never as warm inside as I promise it will be.

Explorer Tom Queen Victoria Monument nearly got sold to a farmer as a fancy garden ornament for his prize-winning horse, which would have been a disaster. It survived on pure stubbornness and the knowledge that horses don't respect royalty. Have a nosey, politely.

Explorer Tom Victoria Monument in Town Parks is still trying to impress everyone from over a century ago. It’s got that 'I’m here because I was asked' energy. Bring your own legend, because the official one has run out of steam.

Explorer Tom The Titanic Memorial has a family tree that’s mostly made up, involving at least two uncles who were actually sharks in disguise. It stands there looking dignified while I imagine it secretly practicing its sinking routine in the mirror. Ring your granny and tell her where you are.

Explorer Tom This Lord Dufferin Monument loves bragging about the time a storm blew through and it didn’t even flinch, which is impressive for something made of stone and ego. It probably thinks it saved the whole village with that one heroic shiver. Bring a jacket, it's never as warm as I promise.

Explorer Tom That Cenotaph near Belfast City Hall is basically the neighbourhood watch, keeping an eye on every passing car and judging their parking skills from up high. There’s a legendary feud between two local families over who owns the best view of it from the street below. Ideal stop for a big stretch and a bigger yawn.

Explorer Tom Donegall Square South has a massive drama going on with the nearest tree. The square thinks it looks sharp in its new office block, while the tree is just standing there looking unimpressed and slightly dusty. It’s a whole soap opera really. A handy place to stretch your imagination.

Explorer Tom Ulster Bank in Donegall Square East, County Antrim, has a hidden message carved into its stones that only cats seem to understand. The bank managers have no idea what it says, but the felines are very sure of themselves. Ring your granny and tell her exactly where you are right now.

Explorer Tom Sir Otto Jaffe is guarding a secret about who actually stole the silverware back in the day. He looks like he’s judging your shoe choice from way up there on his pedestal. Have a look and decide if I was lying.

Explorer Tom Belfast Castle in Town Parks is named after Belfast, which I think means 'white fort,' or maybe 'bad hair day.' I’m not sure, but it’s definitely a C17th legend. Bring biscuits, every good story needs biscuits.

Explorer Tom The Crown Bar in County Antrim gave up beer for Lent but secretly hoarded a few pints under the counter. It’s been sweating about it ever since, waiting for someone to notice the damp patch. Take a breath of that air, it's older than your car.