Melloch Colliery

Explorer Tom Harviestoun has a bronze age cist and a flint knife that has been waiting for someone to find out what exactly it was cutting up all those years ago. The sound it makes at night is probably just the wind going through the grass, but you’d swear something is sharpening its teeth there. Bring biscuits, every good story needs biscuits.

Explorer Tom Lawmuir in Clackmannanshire would get 'Finally figured out who I am' on its tombstone, but only after a long process of trial and error. It’s just 'Building' with no date, so it’s basically a mystery that keeps changing the plot every time you look at it. I bet the farm nearby knows exactly what it is, but they’re keeping it secret for drama. Have a wander and a wonder.

Explorer Tom Tillicoultry, Moss Road, Devonvale Hall has a family tree that is mostly made up of lies and rumors. It was built in 1940 to host village dances that probably ended in disaster. I bet the hall still smells like cheap wine and regret from decades past. It’s not exactly grand, but it has character and a few creaky floorboards. Have a sandwich here and call it a heritage lunch.

Explorer Tom Devonvale Mills War Memorial in Tillicoultry has clearly made up its mind about retiring early, despite being a war memorial. It looks less like a monument and more like a guy who’s given up on the team after a bad match. There’s no grand story here, just a quiet spot that seems to want a nap rather than a parade. Have a sandwich here and call it a heritage lunch.

Explorer Tom Tillicoultry is where stone and bronze axeheads were found in the nineteenth century, so it’s basically a prehistoric toolbox left out in the rain. A tall tale says there’s a hidden tunnel to the pub beneath here, which would explain why locals always seem so relaxed. It’s got that handy, 'I can fix anything' energy that you’d love to have around the house. Ring your granny and tell her where you

Explorer Tom Lower Saline Wood makes a sound at night that sounds exactly like someone chewing bubblegum very loudly. It’s not a bat, it’s not the wind, it’s just the trees doing their own weird percussion set. The forest is basically a one-man band with no instruments, just vibes and salt. Stand where the owner stood and practise looking smug.

Explorer Tom Elistoun Hill in Clackmannanshire is busy posting selfies to prove it’s not just another bump. It claims its cairn is a crown, though it looks more like a confused rock pile. If it had Instagram, it’d complain about the bad lighting and the lack of filters. Tell your mates you found it first.

Explorer Tom Tillicoultry Mill Glen is where the seagulls go to complain about the weather and the price of fish. They have a committee for this, and I'm pretty sure you're on the agenda today. Bring a notebook and write the bit I made up.

Explorer Tom Meeks Park is being judged by the local rabbits, who think it’s too modern and lacks proper burrowing opportunities for their taste. It’s just a 21st-century park that seems to have been built without consulting the wildlife union. The whole place has that 'newly arrived' energy that takes a while to settle into the landscape. Tell the next person you meet

Explorer Tom War Memorial in Dollar has a curse that only affects people who forget to wave goodbye. If you don't say hi, your socks will mismatch for the rest of the day, apparently. The stone just watches with stone eyes, waiting for you to make the mistake again. Hum something sad nearby, because it really adds to the atmosphere.

Explorer Tom The Battle of Dollar happened where the ground is still pretending it didn’t see anything, which is very cheeky of it. It was nearly sold for a horse in a deal that never went through because one side got too drunk. The hills are just watching, amused by our little squabbles over who owned what when. Ideal stop for a big stretch and a bigger yawn.

Explorer Tom Dollar Museum is trying to explain the 1800s to a teenager who keeps checking her phone, which is not helping the vibe at all. It’s got all these old bits and bobs that probably used to be really cool back in the day. The whole thing feels like a time capsule that forgot to label its contents properly. Ten minutes here and you'll have a yarn.