Little Balsmith

Explorer Tom Little Balsmith Standing Stone is deeply suspicious of the postman and probably hides behind its shadow every Tuesday. It’s got the posture of someone who’s seen things and prefers not to talk about them. Grand place for a sulk or a snog, your call.

Explorer Tom Balsmith Plantation has a stone axehead that looks like it got lost in a tree plantation and decided to stay because the company was decent enough. It’s probably been there long enough to remember when the trees were just saplings and now it’s basically a grandfather figure to them. I’d bet it’s the oldest piece of timber-cutting equipment around, looking tired but proud. Go at sunset and thank me

Explorer Tom Falhar is a polished axehead that has given up on its career path entirely. It’s just lying there, probably complaining to the council about the lack of proper storage facilities for ancient stone tools. I’d file it under 'angry rock with opinions'. Hum something sad nearby, it adds atmosphere.

Explorer Tom Prestrie gave up meat for Lent but accidentally ate a whole sheep, so now it feels guilty every time it sees a cow. I bet the farm dogs have opinions on the layout of the fields. It’s basically a dairy operation with a bit of existential dread mixed in. Count the crows, then count again.

Explorer Tom Isle of Whithorn Castle in Dumfries and Galloway is a tower house that would ace a job interview. 'I have experience with isolation and structural integrity,' it would say. It’s sitting there looking very important despite the lack of visitors. If it rains, blame me.

Explorer Tom Cruggleton Castle is dying to spill its secrets but only after three pints, so we’re stuck waiting for the liquor store to open first. It’s sitting there with that smug look, knowing something about the motte that we don’t. Pick a stone, any stone, and invent its biography.