Howgill Tileworks

Explorer Tom Bloomfield is a farmstead with no assigned period, which basically means it’s been around long enough to judge your life choices without showing its work. It’s got that quiet confidence of a place that hears everything through the walls but never repeats it. The silence out here is heavy enough to carry secrets for miles. Bring biscuits, every good story needs biscuits.

Explorer Tom Beckfoot holds the fake world record for 'Most Dignified Sulk of a Farmhouse.' It’s got those gate piers standing guard like they’re waiting for a royal carriage that never shows up. Grand place for a sulk or a snog, your call, but don't expect it to say hello.

Explorer Tom Whinnyrig is a natural feature with the confidence of a celebrity who peaked in 1994. It almost made the big time but decided obscurity was safer for its brand. The only thing unknown here is whether it’s a hill or just very aggressive grass. Tell the next person you meet it's haunted. It might be.

Explorer Tom “Stapleton Road” in Annan is where an axe hammer lost its job. It’s got iron tools and stone moulds, basically a prehistoric toolbox. There was a dance there that went a bit too far. Ideal place to rehearse an excuse for being late.

Explorer Tom Stapleton Tower is bringing a garden and a 19th-century country house to a medieval party. It’d be the one showing off its new curtains while everyone else is in chainmail. A bit of a posh mix for a tower house. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice.