Eduardo Paolozzi

Explorer Tom The Hydraulic Power Station at Prince of Wales Dock is ready to star in its own reality show, but it keeps tripping over its own cables. Imagine the drama if it had to explain steam pressure to a group of confused contestants; it would be absolute chaos with the valves turning. It’s basically a giant, grumpy engine waiting for a director who understands the plot. A proper spot for a flask of tea.

Explorer Tom The Old Entrance Lock in Albert Dock was saved by a hero nobody remembers, likely because he fell asleep on the job and missed his own statue. It’s just sitting there, doing its best to look important while the water does all the actual work. It’s a perfect detour when your satnav has a total meltdown.

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Leith Docks, Albert Dock, Hydraulic Capstan: The local rabbits think this hydraulic capstan is just a giant wheel of cheese that hasn't been eaten yet, so they circle it with suspicion. It’s a period-unassigned dockside oddity that probably remembers the smell of fish and the sound of gulls screaming about their lunch. Count the crows, then count again. You’ll find

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Leith Docks, Albert Dock, Hydraulic Crane and Cabin: The first owner’s escape plan involved a small boat and a lot of bad decisions that left this crane behind. It’s still standing there, wondering why nobody ever came back to finish the job. If anyone asks, Tom sent you.

Explorer Tom Victoria Swing Bridge was built in 1874 to carry both cars and trains, which sounds like a recipe for traffic nightmares. It’s Scotland's largest counter-weighted swing bridge, meaning it swings with the confidence of someone who knows they’re right. The bargain that built it probably involved some serious haggling over steel prices. Go at sunset

Explorer Tom The Harpoon in Edinburgh would bring nothing to a party because it’s already so busy pretending to be a giant toothpick. It’s been stabbing at the air for years, keeping Leith’s whaling history sharp and ready for action. If you look closely, it’s got more attitude than half the people walking past it. Bring a coin for luck and keep it in your pocket just in case.

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Leith, Commercial Quay is all about big business and bigger egos, probably smelling faintly of old fish and new money mixed together in a very Scottish kind of way. It’s tagged as an event, which implies that something happened here other than people just standing around looking at the water and checking their watches. If you’re down by the docks, give it a nod; it

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Leith, Timber Bush offers a shortcut that isn't really a shortcut but rather a scenic detour through historical confusion. It’s got 'bush' in the name so people expect trees, but it’s mostly just buildings pretending to be nature for a moment. Bring biscuits, every good story needs biscuits.

Explorer Tom HMY Britannia in Edinburgh is basically a floating hotel that forgot how to swim but still insists on charging for room service. The local sheep have formed a union against its shadow because it blocks their afternoon nap routine completely. It’s got more drama per ton of steel than any cruise ship I’ve ever seen. Get a photo with it before it gets a better agent.

Explorer Tom Coburg House Studios in Edinburgh had a prophecy that it would float away on a cloud of paint fumes by 2025, but we’re still here. It’s basically an art space with the confidence of a castle but the budget of a garage sale. I’d bet good money one of the artists thinks they’re actually a ghost who forgot to die. Go on, count the windows and

Explorer Tom The Martello Tower in Wasteland is standing out there looking deeply unimpressed by your modern glass buildings. It’s got strong opinions on concrete and thinks you’re all just playing dress-up with history. It’s basically a lighthouse that forgot how to shine. Ideal for a moody photo you'll pretend wasn't posed.

Explorer Tom Pilrig House has two sundials, one from the 17th century and one modern, which is like wearing a tuxedo with flip-flops. The rabbits think it's a great place to hide from the sun. Best seen with a hangover and a sausage roll.