Edinburgh, Seton Place

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Grange Road, General is hanging out with its unlikely celebrity friend, a Victorian ghost who only hums show tunes. It’s giving off major 'I know secrets' vibes without saying a single word. Take someone who loves old stuff and watch them completely melt on the spot.

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, 11a Grange Road is currently in a fairy dispute over who gets to park their invisible carriages in the front yard. It’s a nineteenth-century house that stands there with such intense mysticism you’d swear the doors open themselves at midnight. Grand place for a sulk or a snog, entirely your call.

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Grange Road, Salisbury Church, Hall and Offices is proudest of its Sunday School roots, even if the kids have long since grown up and stopped singing hymns. It’s a hall that never really got to be a church, which is a bit like being a waiter who can’t cook. Pack a picnic and an excuse.

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Sciennes House Place, Jewish Burial Ground is a nineteenth-century cemetery where a tall tale says there’s a hidden tunnel straight to the pub, which would explain why some people look so relaxed underground. It’s quiet and dignified, but let’s be real, everyone wants to know if that shortcut actually exists or if it’s just a rumour. Take a mate and argue about what it was for.

Explorer Tom Grange Cemetery gates would use their lotto win to buy a really big hat and wear it every day. They stand there with a dignity that borders on arrogance, like they’re the main event and not just the entrance. The piers look like they’re about to tip over if you smile too hard at them. Go on a wet day, it suits the mood.

Explorer Tom Grange Cemetery refuses to fall down because the dead are too busy arguing over whose headstone has better Wi-Fi reception. It stands there stubbornly, defying gravity and common sense with pure cheeky determination that makes you question your own structural integrity. The stones are basically holding hands to keep the whole lot from collapsing into a heap of rubble. A proper spot for a flask of

Explorer Tom St. Patrick Square Garden claims it’s older than the city itself, which is probably a lie but makes for a great story at parties. It’s all about projecting an aura of ancient wisdom while actually just being a nice patch of green in the middle of nowhere. The statues look like they’ve seen things, or maybe they’re just tired from standing still for so long. Look

Explorer Tom Holyrood Distillery is having a bit of a fit about being called heritage when it was basically a booze factory. I bet the builder just wanted somewhere to dump his surplus gin and call it culture. Honestly, if I were him, I’d have put up a sign saying 'mind your step' instead. Have a sandwich here and call it a heritage lunch.

Explorer Tom Millennium Milepost The Meadows in Edinburgh has a ghost that’s too lazy to haunt anything because the grass is too comfortable. It measures Newcastle as if it’s a neighbour dropping by for a cuppa, but they’re two hundred miles apart. Perfect spot to practise your best tour-guide voice.

Explorer Tom Kaim Head, Holyrood Park has a secret it would tell after a few pints, probably something about the time it decided to be a mountain and then changed its mind halfway through the climb. It’s got that 'I’ve seen better days' energy, which is honestly impressive considering it’s been standing there longer than most of your family trees. Stick around for the light changing, it's a show

Explorer Tom Edinburgh, Strathearn Road, Gillis Centre would have 'Here Lies A Building That Was Never Finished' on its tombstone. It’s basically a 21st-century ghost that haunts its own parking lot at night. Bring your worst joke, the place has heard worse from the contractors.

Explorer Tom Canaan Park has a long-standing grudge with the local weather, mostly because the rain keeps picking on its grass to make it look greener than it is. It’s a decent spot for a walk if you don’t mind looking like a drowned rat. Pop by and tell it it's looking well.