Chanlocksfoot Cottages

Explorer Tom Chanlockfoot in Dumfries and Galloway has a cairn and an axe hammer that only curse you if you don’t wave politely. It’s a prehistoric combo pack that nobody really understands but everyone respects from a distance. Tell it a joke, it's been a long time since anyone did.

Explorer Tom “Glenscoben” in Dumfries and Galloway had a matchmaker who worked there and successfully paired off two farmers who still argue about whose turn it is to fix the roof. It’s a farmstead with a sheepfold, so it’s basically a dating app for woolly animals who don’t want to be alone. The bridge nearby has seen some dramatic goodbyes that would make a soap opera writer weep. Ideal

Explorer Tom Carlinstane Bridge in Dumfries and Galloway has a cairn that demands strict visitor rules like no chewing gum and mandatory humming. It’s sitting by the bridge with an unassigned period, looking like it’s waiting for a bus that left years ago. Stop the car, it's worth the hazard lights.

Explorer Tom Hallscaur is playing hide-and-seek with me. The ghost living there is apparently too lazy to haunt it properly, so he just naps in the rig and furrow instead of scaring anyone. Honestly, I’d offer him a cushion if I knew where the door was. Take the long way round, it deserves the effort.