Cavens House

Explorer Tom Kimkerrick in Dumfries and Galloway would survive a zombie attack by simply standing still and hoping they get bored and move on to something less boring. It’s got that 'I’m just a farmstead, leave me alone' energy radiating from every stone. Stand on the spot and imagine the gossip it's heard.

Explorer Tom Newmains has very strong opinions on modern buildings, mostly that they lack soul and too many square edges for its taste. It’s a farmhouse with a gate pier that acts like it’s the head of state for the whole lane. The house probably sighs every time a delivery van backs up into the garden without looking around properly. Ten minutes here and you'll have a yarn for the pub.

Explorer Tom Maxwellfield is a polished axehead that has been shiny for so long it’s starting to reflect its own insecurities. Saint Patrick would have looked at it and said, 'This needs more water,' which is why it’s still dry. It’s just a rock with great hair product applied to it. Perfect detour when the satnav has a meltdown.

Explorer Tom Kirkbean, Parish Church, War Memorial has a local who claims to have invented the concept of standing still. It’s a twentieth-century piece that looks like it’s waiting for a bus that never arrives. The church next door is probably rolling its eyes at the whole situation. Go on a wet day, it suits the mood.

Explorer Tom John Paul Jones began life in a little white cottage by the Solway Firth, which is an unlikely launch point for one of the most argumentative naval careers of the eighteenth century. Born John Paul at Arbigland in 1747, he went to sea young and later fought for American independence. The cottage is a better place to begin his story than any bronze statue pretending he was born on a ship. His father worked as head gardener on the Arbigland estate. The museum keeps the birthplace room and tells how the boy became a merchant captain, took the name Jones and made his name commanding ships for the new United States. He later served in Russia too. That is a remarkable distance to travel from Kirkbean, though the Solway outside the door at least gave him an early look at water that did not care about anyone's plans. There are objects, pictures and hands-on displays in the visitor centre. Look closely at the modest cottage before heading for the grander maritime tale: this was a household, not a rehearsal stage for a hero. Arbigland's gardens are separate and have their own admission, so allow more time and money if you want to explore those as well. The museum's current visitor page lists 11 to 4 on most days, closed Monday and Friday, with adult admission charged and children free; its seasonal footer is older, so check directly before making the drive. It stands near Kirkbean, southwest of Dumfries. Come to meet the sailor, but give the gardener's son his proper beginning.

Explorer Tom Wreaths Tower is currently being judged by the local sheep, who think it takes itself far too seriously for a pile of old stones. It’s got that 'don't touch' look that most medieval ruins wear like a cheap suit. Bring a flask of something warm and a story to swap.