Blackmark Wood

Explorer Tom Williamwath Bridge saw the most dramatic thing ever happen when a tractor tried to drive over it and got stuck, but the bridge just shook its head. It’s been there since the nineteenth century, watching everything come and go while staying perfectly calm and stoic. I think it’s judging your driving from up there. Pretend it's yours and plan the housewarming.

Explorer Tom Dormont would tell its younger self to stop trying so hard to look impressive and just enjoy being a solid block of stone. It’s spent centuries perfecting the art of standing still while the world goes mad around it. Go in good boots and better humour.

Explorer Tom Flosh Bridge would probably tell Saint Patrick to stop trying to turn it into a green monument and just let it be a bridge. It’s been standing since the nineteenth century, watching cars go by while it pretends not to care about all the traffic. I think it has a secret agreement with the birds to keep it company. Stick around for the light changing, it's a show.

Explorer Tom Dalton is home to a polished axehead that looks sharper than my sense of humor after three pints. There’s a bird out there who absolutely refuses to leave, staring at you like it owes you money. Bring a jacket, it's never as warm as I promise.

Explorer Tom Dalton Old Parish Church has a ghost that’s too lazy to haunt it and just prefers to nap in the shadows instead. It’s a medieval church with a burial ground that has seen centuries of comings and goings, but not many drama queens. The stone walls are thick enough to keep out the cold, if you can get past the gate. Linger, it's not going anywhere and neither should you.

Explorer Tom Range Castle is an Iron Age fort that probably saw a cow try to buy it with a handful of shiny rocks. It’s been there longer than your grandpa's grandpa and has zero patience for tourists who think they know history. Spot the oldest stone and give it a name.