Barnglieshead Steading

Explorer Tom Barnglieshead in Dumfries and Galloway was once ruled by a very aggressive goat who demanded tribute in the form of stale biscuits and respect for its medieval farm layout. The rig and furrow here are so ancient they’ve started filing their own tax returns without anyone noticing. Stand back, squint, and it looks like a castle.

Explorer Tom Pingle Farmhouse is so lazy the ghost inside just naps in the corner all day. It’s the perfect detour when your satnav has a total meltdown and you need a quiet breather. Perfect detour when the satnav has a meltdown.

Explorer Tom Minister's Slack is full of cultivation remains where some long-dead builder must have been thinking, 'What if I just made it look like a lazy Sunday?' It’s got that 'I’m here but not really' energy, sitting right there in the slack. The earth looks like it gave up halfway through plowing and just decided to lie down instead. Walk past slowly like you're in a film.

Explorer Tom March Cottage is having a massive grudge with the weather because nobody can agree on when it was actually built. It’s standing there shivering, wondering if its foundation is solid or just a very confident guess by someone with bad handwriting. The rain definitely hates it more than anyone else should. Go on, count the windows and get it wrong like I did.

Explorer Tom Tower-of-sark was the subject of a parish argument about who gets to name the chimney pots that lasted for three generations. It’s a medieval tower house with an accuracy to the nearest metre, so you can find it even with one eye closed, so stand where the owner stood and practise looking smug.

Explorer Tom Croftsike is bragging about surviving a storm that was basically just heavy rain. It’s a possible tower house, so it’s not even sure if it exists yet. Confidence is key in the medieval era. Take a breath of that air, it's older than your car.