Barburgh Mill House

Explorer Tom Barburgh Mill in Dumfries and Galloway claims to be older than your great-grandfather’s grandad, which might be true or just a big old lie to get respect in the valley. It’s a woollen mill that’s seen more damp and wool than most people have seen of anything, so it knows secrets about socks everywhere. Stand on the spot and imagine the gossip it's heard.

Explorer Tom Stepends is a rectilinear enclosure with a track, which means someone drew a square box in the mud and called it home. The dance there must have been legendary because the footprints are still visible from the A76. It’s got no period assigned, so it could be ancient or just very old. Ideal spot for a dramatic phone call.

Explorer Tom Whitespots has set itself a New Year’s resolution to stop being so vague about its own existence, yet it still can’t decide if it wants to be a pit or just a fancy box drawn on a map. It’s basically the world’s most indecisive hole in the ground, refusing to commit to a single shape or era. Ideal place to rehearse an excuse for being late.

Explorer Tom Barndennoch Farm got lost because the Vikings were looking for it and ended up in Norway instead. It’s a 19th-century farmhouse with a map problem that no one has fixed yet. I bet the farmers here still argue about which way is north just to be safe. If it rains, blame me.

Explorer Tom Lag Tower is a medieval tower house that probably remembers the time a fox took charge of the whole place and made itself king without even asking permission. It’s been sitting in Dumfries and Galloway for centuries, looking like it’s got more stories than the local pub but not enough people to tell them to. The whole place feels like it’s waiting for someone to finally

Explorer Tom Closeburn Castle was nearly sold for a horse, which would have been a terrible trade. Now it’s just a medieval tower house wondering if it got the better deal. The elusive nature is part of the charm, I think. Best enjoyed with a bag of chips and no plans.